Why do I attract the wrong things into my life?
Coach your “thinking muscle” and enter your Zen
Stop Suffering from Negative Thinking about your Looks.
Eight Steps to Involve Your Body in the Decision-Making Process
Don’t know what you really want to attract into your life?
Discover your Strengths and become a magnet that attracts positive opportunities
Project a mental scenario that attracts the reality you long for
A tip for becoming an attractive women - No matter what your outward appearance
A creative way to complete your routine chores and achieve your personal goals - at the same time…
A simple technique to reconnect to your body and your intuition
Want to have a passionate romance with the most important person in your life?
A great technique for loosening up
Identify the energy drainers and energy snacks in your environment
Have you become a news junkie?
A creative technique for finding little snippets of inspiration
A new and original way to tackle your chores
Want to know where you’re stuck?
A tip for attracting what you want even when you’re feeling depressed, angry or stressed
Want to start taking action but don’t have the time?
Create your own mantras to spark you into acting and attracting
Why do I attract the wrong things into my life?
By Orly Katz
If you are unable to define exactly what you want, love, and desire for your life, you will continue to attract the things you don’t want, and you’ll keep doing so as long as you concentrate on these things. Therefore, you’ve got to start concentrating on what you do want. The following exercise helps you do just that:
- Think of something that happens in your life. over and over again – and you let it happen even though you know it’s not good for you.
For example:
You do poorly in job interviews.
You can’t say “No.”
You can’t manage to save money.
- Make a list of all the undesirable behaviors you repeat again and again in your life. Note how you feel in each case.
- Write the following question: “If I don’t want this behavior to continue, what do I want to happen and how do I want to feel?”
- Picture the perfect scenario in your mind, find the words that best express what you want, and write them down. That’s the first step to repressing your negative voicesand attracting your aspirations and your Inner Core into your life.
When was the last time you made any progress on something you were engaged in and were devoting your full energies to, without thinking about anything else? When was the last time you concentrated totally on what you were doing “here and now,” without being diverted by worries about other matters? In other words, when did you last enter your own ZEN and simply go with the flow, without making other plans or burying yourself in worries?
Was it at your last trip to the beach?
Was it when you were working in the garden?
Perhaps while you were watching a great movie?
Or maybe you don’t remember at all when it was because it’s been so long since you entered your ZEN.
Concentrating on the task at hand pushes our NAFs (our Negative Attraction Factors- Negative voices) aside. We don’t have time to fret and think negative thoughts, and eventually we can attract the reality we long for…
The following tip is a great technique to coach your thinking muscle and enter your Zen:
For the next minute, focus your thoughts on your son – how you sent him off to school today, what he was wearing, what he ate for breakfast, etc. (You can, of course, focus on any other subject that comes to mind.)
Now check whether you thought about anything else during that minute.
If so, you allowed another thought to sneak in, and it came at the expense of – not simultaneously with – the original thought.
Try again and again, until you feel that you have successfully focused on all the little details of your chosen subject for a whole minute.
By Orly Katz
Quite often we obsess over things. An overweight woman might look critically at every other woman she sees on the street, checking out every part of her body from her backside to her thighs and breasts, and ask herself “Am I fatter than she is?” Naturally, our negative voice (In this case: Our Fatso NAF*)will be ready and waiting: “Of course you’re fatter than her, by far!” This nasty, but addictive little habit, nearly ruins our self-esteem and our mood.
Try the following exercise:
Every time Fatso NAF (or any other NAF for that matter) makes you compare yourself to someone else, try and divert that thought in another direction. Check out the other woman’s clothes to see if they match your taste. Look at her shoes and try to guess what she paid for them. In other words, if you have a tendency to compare yourself to other women, don’t waste your time fighting it. But, check out only things you are not sensitive about. You’ll be surprised how effective and calming it can be to (look at the wrapper and not what’s inside).
*NAFs- Our Negative Attraction Factors: Our NAF is our negative voice that leads us to attract into our lives what we do not want and what is not good for us!
We have all, at one time or other, reached a crossroad in our life when we have had to make a fateful decision. No matter how hard the decision, we know that once we’ve made it and are confident we were right, we will relax and be filled with the peaceful sensation that we made the right choice. Until we make that choice however, we go through purgatory.
Our body knows what our heart desires – even if we have worked hard to repress and hide this information over the years. Our body never lies to us, and we can use our body’s vast knowledge to make difficult decisions.
- Clearly define the factors that are hindering your decision-making process.
- Arrange for a relaxing atmosphere: make sure the house is quiet, lie down in a darkened room with nothing to disturb you.
- Breathe in deeply several times to relax yourself, and commence the process.
- Imagine yourself having chosen the first option. What are you doing? What are you wearing? How do you act? Think about all the good things that will result from this option, ignore the negative aspects, and don’t think about the second option.
- Concentrate on the physical sensations and pay attention to how you feel. You can use images, feelings, emotions – anything that works. You can describe your sensations as if you were an object or a child, for instance.
- Now imagine yourself in the second situation, having chosen the second option. What are you doing? What are you wearing? How do you act? Again, you must only think about the good things that will result from this option, ignore the negative aspects, and not think about the first option.
- Concentrate on your physical sensations and how you feel this time. Again, image, feelings, and emotions are all acceptable tools.
- Make your decision, smile, and pamper yourself with a massage – you deserve it!
Our Inner Core represents the most important things in our lives: our passions, our loves and our personal values. Discovering our Inner Core connects with our ability to become magnets that attract positive opportunities and a host of things we desire.
The following tip can help you discover what you love:
Over the course of a week, start to listen to all the other voices in your head (those positive ones) that you’ve ignored until now. What did you enjoy doing in the past? What do you enjoy doing now?
Prepare a list of five things you enjoy doing and that you are able to do without excessive effort. Try and integrate them into your life, even daily. You can start small. Do it just for fun. It doesn’t have to be a complicated “production.”
There might be voices telling you: “You haven’t got time. You don’t have the money. What benefit will you get from an art class once a week?” etc. Ignore those voices and do it anyway.
Discovering our strengths and our talents increase our ability to become magnets that attract positive opportunities and a host of things we desire.
Being able to recognize our natural talents helps us to find our Inner Core. We usually most enjoy doing the things we are good at. Sometimes we’re unaware of our natural talents. Outsiders (people close to us and people we trust) can teach us a lot about ourselves.
Talk to three different people, and ask them:
1 What are my most prominent abilities/strengths?
2. When are these qualities most evident?
3. If I were featured on a magazine cover, which magazine would it be, and what would the article be about?
By Orly Katz
Let’s say you have a fear of public speaking. Every time you address an audience, you start sweating and shaking. When this happens, you need to imagine a film in which you are standing before an audience, lecturing eloquently and calmly, and are in total control with no fear whatsoever. Your audience is pleased and aroused by your presentation, and they have many questions for you at the end. The more detail you add to this positive scene, and the clearer you see it in your mind, the more amazed you’ll be at the results that will soon follow. This is your chance to step into the shoes of one of Hollywood’s greatest directors and produce, direct, and star in a mental scenario that you desire and that will create a positive reality in your life.
None of us is perfect, and at one time or another we are all dissatisfied with our appearance. But if this dissatisfaction becomes an obsession and our negative voicestake control, our good points will be totally camouflaged.
I suggest that you try the following exercise as a deterrent:
Every morning, after you’ve washed your face, look in the mirror, smile, and focus only on your favorite part of your face – the part you take pride in and have no complaints about. Don’t look too closely, and don’t start checking to see the state of your wrinkles. If you find yourself doing that, divert your eyes from the mirror immediately.
A smile lights up our eyes and increases the flow of blood to our cheeks, our mood improves – instantly, and we become attractive- no matter what our outward appearance!
By Orly Katz
We all have a number of routine chores that we’re saddled with each and every day, things we do automatically and barely think about. Washing dishes, folding laundry, walking the dog…
(even if your husband shares responsibility for them – and if he doesn’t, it’s high time he started!).
These tasks are a fertile breeding ground for our NAFs .
(Our Negative Attraction Factors: Our NAF is our negative voice that leads us to attract into our lives what we do not want and what is not good for us!)
If you prepare yourself a list of goals to accomplish while you do each chore (goals that are totally unrelated to the task at hand), you’ll soon see that you not only enjoyed the chore, and completed it quickly, but that it also served a useful purpose.
A woman who attended one of my workshops told me she’d decided to write a book. Though the desire to write had long burned inside her, she had no free time to come up with creative ideas. To her chagrin, her housekeeper quit, and she became stuck with all the household chores. But every time she started a new task, she made herself a list of goals and objectives: “For the next half hour, while I wash these dishes, I’m going to come up with one great idea for my book. And by the end of the week, I’m going to outline the whole chapter...”
You can guess what happened - this woman’s book is now nearly finished!
One way to practice concentrating on and listening to our body’s sensations and our intuition is to pay attention to our breathing. Breathing is a means of communicating with our bodies. It is a simple action that we constantly perform, and it is our most important resource.
If you sense pressure in your stomach, try the following exercise:
Sit or lie down comfortably, and concentrate solely on your breathing. Think only about breathing in and breathing out. Feel the temperature of the air entering your body and the temperature of the air you breathe out. The air is slightly colder as you breathe in, and slightly warmer as you breathe out. Take deep breaths. Breathe in through your nose, and exhale through your mouth.
After concentrating on your breathing for a few minutes, pay attention to your heart rate. Do you feel any kind of tension in your body – in your stomach, neck, shoulders?
Concentrate on the physical sensations in each part of your body. Focus on them for a while to see what happens. Think about these sensations as a secret letter addressed to you. If you are open-minded and curious enough, the letter will open and you can read its message, intended solely for you.
Slowly and gently relax your arms at the sides of your body, rotate your shoulders, open your eyes, and continue breathing deeply.
Now, how does that feel?
By Orly Katz
Have you ever thought about what it would be like to have a passionate romance with… your own body? What would it be like to love your body totally and uncritically, respecting and appreciating it, understanding it, and devoting yourself to it?
Listening to our body and trusting our feminine intuition will make us better able to attract the reality we really want into our lives.
Knowing that our body is our very best friend, we have good reason to be pleased with our body, and to be grateful for it.
Stand at ease, with your legs together and your arms hanging at your sides. Breathe deeply, moving your head, shoulders, and arms in a circular pattern.
Now, stroke your face, your forehead, and your scalp. Massage your scalp, and then move on to massage your feet. Give yourself an enormous hug. When was the last time you hugged yourself and gave your body this much attention? You deserve it, and so does your body!
I recommend that you try this exercise when you are home alone.
Stand at ease, with your legs together and your arms hanging at your sides. Breathe deeply, moving your head, shoulders, and arms in a circular pattern.
Pound your chest with your fists, and make noises like a monkey in the jungle. It might feel a bit embarrassing at first, but you’ll soon see that it’s for a good cause.
Increase the volume of your monkey noises, louder and louder until you are shouting. Don’t worry: the walls absorb all the noise, and your body is being cleansed.
After pounding for a few moments and making all the noise you possibly can, relax your arms, relax your shoulders, move your head in a circular pattern, breathe deeply, and go on with your day.
You’ll be surprised the extent to which we are shaped by our environment. We can change our environment so that it stops bringing us down and begins pulling us upward.
In short, our environment can support us in attracting what we want into our lives.
Over the course of the coming week, pay careful attention to each person you come into contact with (friends, family, colleague etc). Think carefully about the effect each person has on you, and how he or she makes you feel.
Do you feel excited, alert, and energized in their company, or do they make you feel drained, tense, and introverted?
This is the best way to discover who drains your energy and who revitalizes you and gives you new energy.
Remember: your objective is to surround yourself increasingly with energy snacks, (which project positive vibes that helps you attract what you want into your life) and not energy drainers (which project negative vibes).
Have you ever stopped to consider the crazy reality we live in? Every day brings a new scandal, a new tragedy, a new political debacle. People are murdered, wounded, hurt in traffic accidents. Bad news is endless.
Unfortunately the society we live in supplies news at an alarming rate:
There are news programs 24/7 on radio and television.
The newspapers are filled with articles and commentaries about terror attacks, natural disasters, crimes, disease, etc.
Add to that the non-stop negative information available on the Internet.
In other words, bad news makes gets high ratings. We become totally addicted to information and must have access to news 24 hours a day. We must know what is going on, must be up to date on what’s happening, all the time!
But what does this do to us? How does it affect our mood, our energy levels, our motivation, and the vibes we project?
Are you aware of the negative effect of the excessive consumption of negative and stressful information on our lives?
I’m not suggesting that from this day forth you shut your eyes and ears and live in a euphoric bubble into which the news does not penetrate. But I do suggest that you try to “wean” yourself from your heavy diet of news.
Try and set a limit to update yourself on the news just once a day. You can watch or listen to one main newscast per day – and that’s it. No cheating! I promise you that whatever you need to know you’ll find out from that newscast, and you won’t feel “out of things.” You’ll find yourself getting up in the morning with a new glint in your eye and even a smile on your face. And, of course, you’ll suddenly have an endless supply of free time on your hands!
Once you are able to recognize your Inner Core, and you know what you have to do to fulfill it, your environment can become a fertile source of inspiration. Make a conscious decision to open your eyes, prick up your ears, and look for little snippets of inspiration hiding in the world around you.
A fascinating article in the newspaper might fill your head with new and interesting ideas, ideas that could help you achieve your goals. Meeting an interesting person could open a new door to an unexpected place. Even an engaging TV program could have the same effect.
You have to decide that you are going to concentrate on finding “little sources of inspiration” in everything that surrounds you. You’ll be surprised to see that they’re everywhere!
We are all human, and we all have commitments as well as rights. Even though the name of the game is to fulfill our Inner Core, there is no getting away from the daily chores and commitments that make up the bulk of our lives as working women, mothers, and homemakers. Of course we all have some tasks that we would prefer to ignore, but we cannot afford ourselves that luxury.
So how can we derive inspiration from our environment to help us with our daily tasks?
This is where imagination and creativity come into play. The following are several helpful ideas for women like us, and you are most welcome to add your own.
- Make an elaborate promise. The pressure to keep your promise will ensure that you do what you’ve undertaken to do. For example: promise yourself that within a month you will lose ten pounds, and then tell all your friends. Their expectations will spur you on to keep your promise.
- If the house is a complete mess and you keep finding reasons not to tidy up, one good solution is to invite guests over. Then you have no choice – you have to knuckle down and start cleaning!
- If you have to present a project at work, but you are “unable” to start working on it, schedule a meeting with your boss for a week from today to bring him up to date on your progress, and show him your results. Now you have to start working on that project if you want to have something to show him!
- If you keep giving in to your lethargy and skipping your regular exercise sessions, make a standing arrangement with a friend to go to an exercise class or take a daily walk. You will think twice about canceling your arrangement and letting your friend down, and that way you’re sure to get the regular exercise you need!
Sometimes we need to leave “familiar territories” and do something new and different in order to attract new opportunities to our lives.
Our Comfort Zone consists of all those things that don’t threaten or deter us- familiarity, routine, habits, behavior patterns and a ”place” we know well. We operate within a comfort zone that doesn’t present a challenge to us. We stay there because we feel uneasy whenever we venture beyond it.
Choose one day, and “devote” it to recognizing your own comfort zones. For example:
What time do you wake up in the morning?
What, if anything, did you wear last night?What is the “division of labor” at home in the morning? Who walks the dog? Who hurries the kids up? Who makes the coffee?
What clothing do you wear during the day?
Do you wear make up?
Do you travel the same route every day?
What do you say when you walk into the office?
How do you speak and behave with your co-workers?
How do you speak and behave with your manager/s?
Why do I call these things the “comfort zone?”
Try to imagine what would happen if you decided to get up an hour earlier in the morning, to allow yourself some time alone?
What would happen if you decided to wear a sexy negligee for bed, instead of an old tracksuit?
What would happen if just once you didn’t keep after the children up in the morning and let them take responsibility for themselves?
What would happen if you went out without makeup? Or you wore a different style of clothing?
What would happen if you decided to stand up to your boss and put him in his place?
Does any of that sound difficult? Terrifying?
We know that we are in our comfort zone when the very thought of leaving it frightens or paralyzes us. Instead, we most likely shake our heads and find a good excuse for not taking action.
Any time that you feel depressed, angry, or stressed (which happens to all of us), we attract what we do not want instead of what we want. When this happens to you, just do the opposite.
What do I mean by this?
Do the opposite!
Wear your nicest clothes and best makeup, smile, wish everybody a cheery “Good morning,” laugh out loud. Then watch your mood improve and the clouds disperse. Your demon may not be so terrible... You’ll start projecting positive vibes and attracting the good things that make you feel happy and relaxed after all.
As you know, positive thinking isn’t enough. You also need to act in order to attract what you really want in life.
But, too often, we rely on an age-old excuse for failing to do something: “I didn’t have the time.”
Your daily routine is probably jam-packed, and the following tip might help you organize the mess a bit.
Maximize Your Time – The Time Pie Chart:
Draw a pie chart divided into twenty-four segments, each segment representing an hour of the day.
On a separate sheet of paper, divide your daily routine into different categories, for example: children, partner, work, sleep, chores, leisure activities, telephone calls, friends, sport, hobbies, etc.
After you’ve completed the list of categories, go back to the pie chart and work out how many hours of each day you spend on each. Use a different color for each category to fill in as many segments as needed. For example:
Work 9 hours 9 segments
Sleep 7 hours 7 segments
Children 4 hours 4 segments
Carry on until you’ve filled in all the segments. Now all that remains is to check to see how you divide your time in the course of a day. Is it balanced? Do you spend too much time in one area at the expense of another? Do you leave enough time for yourself, or for hobbies?
Now prepare another, more balanced, chart. And don’t just settle for a drawing. Try putting it into practice.
You’ll be surprised to discover that even though time is a precious commodity, it is actually quite flexible and can be divided in ways that that suit your desires and values.
Once we’ve decided to spring into action to achieve our goals and attract what we truly desire into our lives, a mantra may help give us a running start as we begin the process. Here are some suggestions for creating one of your own:
1. The mantra should be recited in the present tense, as if you’ve already achieved your ambition: “I’m wearing a size 8, and I feel wonderful,” “I’ve got lots of clients, and it’s so satisfying,” “I’m getting along great with my co-workers.”
2. Be sure the mantra you choose really makes you feel good. You may have decided to go on a diet and chose the mantra, “I’m thin, and I feel great.” But reciting it only makes you depressed because you can’t really believe what you’re saying. In that case, change the mantra to one that’s better suited to your personality and makes you feel good. Remember: the law of attraction reacts to vibes that you send out. If you don’t believe your own mantra, you’ll be projecting your doubts, and you’ll fail to attract what really want.
3. Your mantra can relate directly to the process you’re going through. “I’m in the process of marketing my business,” or “I’m working on improving my relationship with my children, and I’m starting to see results.”
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